So my last blog post was about how I have social anxiety and my experience/opinion(sort of) on having it and it got a pretty good response. I'm actually writing this post based on a comment from the last post.
The comment ;
Hello. I am sorry you feel like this and I wonder how long you've been in therapy now? The doctor or therapist who diagnosed you with social anxiety sure tried to help you with coping with situations like this one, right? Maybe you yould make a post about that, about what you learned so far. I'd love reading that and I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.
letscoba.blogspot.com
letscoba.blogspot.com
My response ;
So, I would like to clarify that I wasn't, surgically diagnosed (if that's what happens), it was actually my school who diagnosed me. It basically all started when I got my first report, the amount of confidence concerns was crazy, and my mum looked quite worried. They kept telling me you need to boost your confidence...so I tried, I went up and signed myself up for a singing competition and some other things round the school, and it didn't work. I think the thing that carried it on the longest was the bullying.
So, I would like to clarify that I wasn't, surgically diagnosed (if that's what happens), it was actually my school who diagnosed me. It basically all started when I got my first report, the amount of confidence concerns was crazy, and my mum looked quite worried. They kept telling me you need to boost your confidence...so I tried, I went up and signed myself up for a singing competition and some other things round the school, and it didn't work. I think the thing that carried it on the longest was the bullying.
Anyway, moving on a year, my head of year said, do you want to try out this new school program? She said that I knew everyone that was going and all of that stuff, so I said yeah whatever. I ended up going and my chummie who was supposed to be there, wasn't and I had only talked to everyone there, once - most of them I'd only said hi to. So I felt myself panicking and slightly sweating. It got worse because I had to sit in a room with all these people (there were about 5 of them) I had hardly know and hardly spoken to, and I was just like, what am I doing here? How do I get out? How long will I be waiting here? What if someone tries to talk to me etc etc....
Anyway, the lady came in late, all smiles and happiness, and all that, and I realized that I really didn't want to go through a whole hour of her and these people that I couldn't relate to in anything other than the reason that we were all going through this trial session thing that I'm going to call Group Therapy because that's what it basically was.
So this lady had us all sat in a room and she got us to go around and say our names and something 'unique' or 'special' about ourselves. I got all my words mixed up, went red in the face and had to repeat myself...which was highly annoying. When that was finished, she started talking. She kept this stupid smile on her face as she was speaking, and it really frustrated me. You know when someone is overly happy? That's what she was and it was really irritating.
Anyway, we said all the things we felt had stuff to do with anxiety and stuff and she said that if we had at least 5 of those symptoms you have this kind of anxiety or that kind of anxiety. So indirectly, this random lady who worked with the school diagnosed me with social anxiety. It wasn't that much of a huge surprise and I just wanted the Group Therapy crap to end because she was basically a really happy lady telling me stuff I pretty much already knew.
On the last day of Group Therapy she gave us all wads of paper with stuff to help relax you and other stuff that didn't work. I mean, all to their own - it might work for some people, but it really didn't do anything for me, so my advice to anyone who is going through this but meditating and other stuff like that doesn't actually do anything for them, I'd just recommend doing things that you feel comfortable doing that you think might help. You could Google idea's but don't believe all the stuff on the page because the introduction will probably tell you that you're dying and have 4 hours to live or something ridiculous, just scroll down and look at the ideas in bold (if they're in bold) don't read the other print because again it will say that if you don't do that particular step, you'll get some deadly disease or something.I hope that satisfied you Coba and ...
That's it
Kalli xxx
OH YEAH I ALMOST FORGOT!!!
I made a YouTube video...yes my FIRST video on my own channel FINALLY!!! If you click here >>> https://youtu.be/6XZz6neQuWc <<<you can watch the video!!! Hope you like it!!!
That's definitely it...
Kalli xxx
I am really glad you replied to my comment that deeply, but sadly my initial question wasn't answered. That may be due to me writing in a way that could be misunderstood. I'll try to rephrase:
ReplyDeleteWhat helped you so far? Is there anything at all that helps you dealing with your social anxiety?
Your entry sounds like all you've tried so far only made it worse, which is very sad.
Here, have a virtual hug: ♥
letscoba.blogspot.com
You're right, the stuff the lady gave me did fail, but I have more recently, been making more of an effort to build friendships with the people I would only speak to for about 2 minuets every now and then, and now some of us are close friends and I'm able to hold a conversation with them like how I would hold a conversation with my chummie. Looking back at how I was before, I guess my confidence has boosted since I've gained more friendships, but it was a slow process, however I felt that was the right way to go - it was the way I felt comfortable. But as I said, all to their own, I mean, if sitting somewhere quiet and meditating or focusing on breathing, or looking in the mirror and telling yourself that you're confident helps you in a better way, obviously do that. I think just doing things your own way helps best, that's what I found and although I still have a long way to go, if I keep going this way forward I should be back to myself soon(ish). I think just experiment and when you find a way to move forward that you're comfortable with that should help you. Stay as positive as possible, that's always good for me, you know just smile and the world smiles back? That kind of thing helps too.
DeleteI hope this helped you out a bit more than the blog post!
Virtual Hugs <3
Kalli xxx